What to Do When a Colleague Is Annoying You

当你和他人紧密在一起工作的时候，紧张的情况是一定会产生的。我们许多人在这些情况下都不会吭声，担心一旦讲出来会伤害到友谊。

但是让事情就这样闷在心里头经常会让事情更糟糕。反而，应该用一种积极的方式把情况说清楚。

首先，要确保你的出发点是为了更好的合作。不要只是发泄你的不满；你可以这样说，“ 我们的工作关系对我来说很重要，对此我有些想法，我可以跟你讲讲么？”

接着，要基于事实，描述一个特定的事件，这件事让你感受是怎么样的，以及为什么这件事对你来说重要。一定要问，“ 对于这件事你是怎么看的？” 留意对方的回答，即使你不同意。

然后要决定如何共同改善这个情况。当大家携起手来解决这个问题，情况就完全可能得到改善。

When you work closely with other people, tensions are bound to arise. Many of us bite our tongues in these situations, worrying that speaking up will harm the relationship.

But letting something simmer often makes things worse. Instead, address the situation in a productive way.

First, make sure that your intention is to be more collaborative. Don’t just launch into your spiel; say something like, “Our working relationship is important to me, and there’s something on my mind — can I talk to you about it?”

Then stick to the facts, describing one particular incident, how it made you feel, and why it matters to you. Be sure to ask, “What’s your perspective on this?” Pay attention to the answer, even if you disagree. 

Then decide how to improve the situation together. When both people have a hand in shaping the solution, the situation is more likely to improve.